Monday, August 16, 2010

Not Fitting In

I originally wrote this on April 5, 2008

Who am I? I’m sure nobody knows.
They see me, but act as if I’m not there.
I’m the person who lives in the shadows.

I’m here, but I don’t exist.
I talk, but no one hears what I say.
I’m the person everyone would resist.

Where am I going? It doesn’t matter.
I’m sure no one cares
They don’t see this person about to shatter.

Who am I? I’m sure nobody cares.
They walk past me and talk to someone else.
I’m the person who sits and stares.

I don’t fit in, and everyone knows.
I sit and entertain myself.
Then I look up, and wonder, is this how life really goes.


  1. Greetings Julie -

    You indeed fit in -- into the kingdom of GOD and as such, you fit everywhere He leads you - Where GOD leads, you belong.

    Love you dear sister in Christ, Sandra

  2. Hi Sandra,
    Thank you. I guess I've found that people I meet in church are not always going to accept me, and that I, at times, can be truly invisible to them, but then I guess I do have to open my mouth a little bit more if I want to be a part. Either that, or I just need to get myself a bit more involved. Maybe both.

  3. Whatever is necessary, please seek the Lord for wisdom and discernment. There are many people that are in league with the Devil who go to churches. The Lord promised me that in every church I attended, that there would always be a few who are serious about Him.

    Please try the spirits before you open yourself to anyone. Church people who are NOT true worshippers can sometimes be more vicious than bona fide sinners. Often that is because we do not expect viciousness from church people so they can catch us off guard whereas with bona fide sinners, we have expectations that they will behave sinfully.

    Guard your heart.

    What I have expressed here may sound pessimistic but from experience,I know that it is vital to seek the Lord about who to allow space in your heart.

    Our Father has taught me to love, and to forgive but that trust has to be earned.

    Every church person that hugs is not godly and often hugs are not sincere. A couple of years ago, the Lord told me to stop letting insincere people in churches hug on me. As long as we commune closely with our Lord, He gives discernment about who is sincere. Now when I refuse hugs, I do NOT do it abruptly. rudely. I gracefully back up, smile and greet the potential huggers. It is not easy to explain. I hope that you get the drift. NOT take my word for any of the Lord for how he leads You.
    I felt led to share my experiences....

    Also, what I did was pray that the Lord would send into my life kingdom-minded saints. He has done that via the Internet and my blog but so far , I am still waiting for it to happen with more in-person contacts...I trust GOD and shall no longer settle for carnal Christians as close associations...I'd rather wait on GOD's best.

  4. Thank you Sandra for your words here, I will definitely be careful, and guard my heart. God is my help, and my guide.